Late(ly)-ish

Recent piX

December 16th

Day one of suspension. It's nice to have some time to relax before and after finals.

666

Today I woke up hungover and tired at around 12:30, threw on pants and shoes, got delicious peppermint chocolate coffee, got a new book, and smoked 6 - 7 blunts. I wish every Sunday went this smoothly.

Actions/everything

It seems as if I keep getting sidetracked...

What's real and what's not?
What defines the line between needs and wants?
What the fuck???

It never ends

The grass is fucking dead
on both sides of the fence
mouthfuls of words
that you never really meant
a lack of self worth
and a wealth of self doubt
not one fucking thing
to be positive about

Life

Life is weird and I don't exactly know what it is that I want at this point. Opportunities are endless... or are they? Bahaha

RIP

Today my beautiful frosted Illadelph piece fell off of the counter and shattered. Not only is it broken but broken into 10 or more pieces. Fuck today, fuck this weather, fuck work, and fuck everything else, hahaha.

Oct. 19th

Its mid-late October and life is weird. Yesterday I went downtown to Washington University to submit my art portfolio not really knowing what to expect. Overall 3 of the 5 schools were really interested in my work. It was cool to hear and most definitely the highlight of my weekend. The weather was awesome today and it's suppose to be tomorrow as well. The leaves are slowly starting to fall. School and work are tiring and so is dealing with unnecessary situations that seem to repetitively fall in front of me. I'm tired.

Here are some photos of some of the sketchbook work I submitted yesterday:

Lesson of the day

When things or a situation seem TOO good, they fucking are.

Yo

Being sick sucks, constant rain sucks, and laying around doing nothing on the weekend sucks.

Repetitive routine

Days are becoming more and more repetitive, it sucks.

It's a shame

You've only yourself to blame.

Today I started a journal that will eventually be filled with thoughts, ideas, experiences, sketches, etc... I don't wanna call it a diary because it's not, it's something more. Something that I can reflect back on some day or use in the future at some point. Maybe I just have too much time and too many ideas.

Honestly?

I hate the way things constantly change. I miss summer, having limited worries, enjoying long days with even longer nights, and spending time with friends.

Realization

You were always a joke to me, but it's cool because I'm on to bigger and better things. LOLOLOLOL.

September already

The weather is changing drastically to cooler days and nights. It's nice to look forward to the winter months. School is back to a constant flow which is cool I guess, it doesn't bother me too much unless my schedule gets fucked causing me to go from school to work like 3 or 4 days in a row, leading to 12 hour days and no time to spend with friends. I'm really indifferent about a lot of friends and people in my life right now which is shitty. People tend to play games and hide real feelings, I'm all about the truth and real feelings. Things may be changing in the future, for better or for worse.

PS: Stoked I got off work and got to attend this show, it ruled.

I just wanna be happy...

August 18th

It's mid August, I'm back to school, and a lot of things have been changing around me. Lately I'm feeling stress with school and work back to back, sometimes it's nice to have a break. I've also just been worried about random things/people in my life as well as the shitty situations that I love getting myself into. Only time will tell how things will end up...

On a more positive note, I've been making a lot more art. (Ink, paint, watercolor, etc) It feels good having motivation and inspiration after slowing down so much during the summer months. I hope to crank out some ill paintings and maybe even some screen printing.

August

Lately (in the past week or two), I've been trying to just enjoy whats left of this short-lived, confusing, and eventful summer. I've been experiencing a lot of different emotions towards different people in my life and I'm learning more and more as time goes by that some things are just hard to deal with...

My birthday

Today started off horrible.

Hmph

I feel like nothing lasts forever...

- July 13th

I don't want to sound like I'm overly depressed because I'm not, but to feel even the slightest amount of depression at my age and time in life is ridiculous. What the fuck.

- Terrible Days

I wish I could express how much hate I have for the world and society. And you wonder why everything's a joke to me...

- Things are well

┌∩┐(-_-)┌∩┐

Too much is never enough.

...

I woke up today feeling the sickest I have in weeks. I'm not surprised.

- Cycles of endless hate

I honestly don't give a fuck, every time I start to, all I do is waste my time/energy.

- Herrin, IL

- Worddd

Hands down, best weekend I've had in awhile. It consisted of sick tourist attractions, campouts, awesome adventures and spending time with my cougar as fuck girlfriend.

: }

It's been a while since I actually sat down to write something on here, I've been busy. Things are going well lately. This weekends off to a good start, I have like 5 days of school left, and I get to spend all of next weekend with Abbie. Summer rules.

Self-realization is key, motherfucker.

- Today

Today is a good day. Dead ends are cut and new paths begin to emerge. I'm stoked on life and the future.

- May

This week has been going well so far. I've been doing a lot of relaxing and hanging out with everyone, the weather's getting nicer, summer's almost here, and I just bought a new pair of shoes.

- Currently:

Thinking about everything and dreading tomorrow/the future.

- Today

- Today was a particularly shitty Wednesday. Today was filled with immature, hypocritical, and annoying kids.
- I've realized that I really am a jealous asshole on so many levels which just shows I care more than I should.
- I spent eight and a half hours rotting on this beautiful day and now I'm out to enjoy it!

A lot has happened in the past few days. To be honest I'm confused about a lot of different things and situations that have taken place lately. I want things to be straightened out because I'm tired of being worried and stressed about everything, it sucks.

- Fuck

Never again will things be the way they once were and I hate it.

Fuck scheduled routines, I like letting each day come and randomly letting plans form. I'm tired of school, work, and unnecessary drama that I myself started. I love pushing away the ones I love and care about most. Nahh.

Forever fucked, everything sucks. WHAT DO I DO? WHAT THE FUCK?

- Los Angeles

I finally arrived in LA around 11am yesterday and so far I've seen a lot of great things. First off my sister, her boyfriend, and I went to grab a bite to eat, went to the grocery store and came back to her place. We then headed to a party out in Topanga, up in the mountains. On the way there we passed by Malibu beach which was cool to see. After arriving in Topanga, we went on an adventure up and around the different hills and mountains. It was really neat seeing everything, climbing trees, and adventuring. After we got back we grabbed a bite to eat and headed back home for some rest. I'm having the time of my life and I can't wait to see what's next.

Lately some of my friends have encouraged me to start uploading videos of me rapping which have turned out awesome and I'm stoked for the weekend and L.A.

It's Sunday and the weekend has come to an end once again. The past weekend was great in all aspects. Things are slowly coming together and working out. A week from today I will be on my way to the beautiful city of Los Angeles, California to spend 6 days just kickin' it with my sister and taking in the weather. Soo stoked.

- Lately V.2

The weekend has come to end and making mistakes has been a major learning experience. Not until today did I realize how important some things really are to me.

- Lately

This week has gone by quick, which is really good. I love not having to get up early and doing whatever on the weekends. However I will be heading up to school around 7am Saturday to serve a pointless detention because of the horribly set up schooling system. I have a limited amount of respect for anyone at my school, staff and students. On a more positive note, I'll get to catch up on some reading and by the time I get out, my friends will just be getting up. The past week has been alright and I'm feeling good about the choices I've been making. Armed with a mind! Also, I just got a new pair of super sexy sunglasses.

- Days

I haven't posted in a while, I've been busy and just haven't got around to it. It seems as if lately, days are slowly passing by, containing nothing but ridiculous and pointless situations and occurrences. Lately I've had the most negative outlook on everything and I'm not sure why.

I always tend to get myself in the worst of situations. I've been talking to Liz off and on for a little over a year now and for once it feels different and I love what I have with her. I really can't imagine not having her in my life. There is so much to love about her and I just want things to stay like they are for as long as possible.